A practical guide for everyone in (or considering) an open relationship.
Understand triggers and use empathy scripts so hard moments connect instead of conflict.
Run weekly check‑ins in 30 minutes with a simple agenda and reassurance menu.
Agree on time, info, health, and family — safety and freedom coexisting in practice.
When agreements break, a 6‑step repair process helps you rebuild trust quickly.
This is absolutely for you if you are:
- Curious about opening up and want a safe, structured start
- Already open and want fewer frictions and calmer talks
- Dating someone open and want clarity on boundaries
“It felt like having a couples therapist between us — clear steps, shared language, simple rituals.”
For individuals and couples exploring non‑monogamy — from “just sex with others” to fully polyamorous lives with multiple partners.
Use the playbook like a couples therapist in your pocket: keep alignment, prevent drift, and handle emotions with clear rituals.
For someone dating a person in an open relationship. Get practical insight into agreements, boundaries, and how to fit in respectfully.
All parts of the relationship are covered with practical tools and exercises.
Set clear agreements across time, info, health, family, and support.
30‑minute agenda: grounding, wins, feelings & needs, logistics, updates.
Trigger worksheet, self‑regulation plan, and scripts for empathy.
Pre‑date protocol, post‑date debrief, and STI safety plan.
In eight concise, practical chapters, you’ll learn the processes and exercises to start or sustain a healthy, ethical, non‑monogamous relationship.
Build a shared base: map your network, align values, and define terms together so decisions feel clear, expectations match reality, and jealousy has less room to grow.
Reduce friction with clear, flexible agreements about time, info, health, family, and emotions - plus simple red/amber/green boundaries - so safety and freedom can coexist and renegotiation stays calm.
Stay aligned with a 30‑minute weekly check‑in, ready‑to‑say scripts, and troubleshooting tips that keep talks grounded, prevent spirals, and make reassurance easy to ask for and give.
Understand jealousy by naming what it really is, regulate your nervous system, and use empathy scripts to share needs - so hard moments turn into connection instead of conflict.
Make dates feel safe and drama‑free: agree on plans before, debrief kindly after, and keep STI practices visible - creating more trust, freedom, and better experiences for everyone.
Meet metamours without pressure, set respectful boundaries, and build a support network - so you reduce rivalry, avoid triangulation, and make your wider relationship ecosystem sturdier.
When agreements break, repair fast with a six‑step process: own impact, offer concrete repair, and prevent repeats - so trust is rebuilt and growth replaces lingering resentment.
Keep love adaptive with quarterly reviews and a simple Done/Keep/Change ritual - celebrate wins, update agreements, and vision forward so you keep evolving together on purpose.
Printable worksheets and editable templates you can use tonight. Each tool includes clear prompts and a simple flow.
Align on purpose, time & logistics, info sharing, health & safety, family & social, and emotional support — a shared map that replaces ambiguous “rules.”
Color‑code red/amber/green boundaries so safety is explicit and renegotiation stays calm and specific.
30‑minute agenda with prompts for grounding, wins, feelings & needs, logistics, and updates — built to prevent spirals.
A shortlist of concrete reassurance options you can ask for or offer in hard moments without guesswork.
Spot the trigger, name the story, and translate it into needs so empathy and repair become actionable.
Design a personal down‑shift routine (body, breath, attention) plus partner support requests for acute moments.
Agree on plan, context, and check‑in timing before dates to reduce uncertainty and prevent last‑minute misalignments.
Share high‑signal details and feelings with gentle prompts that keep connection primary and comparison low.
Make health practices visible: test cadence, barrier use, disclosure policy, and how you’ll handle updates.
Set tone and boundaries for a low‑pressure first hello — expectations, what’s welcome, and what’s not.
Visualize your relationship ecosystem so you can spot weak links, add support, and reduce triangulation.
A six‑step repair script that moves from impact to concrete repair and prevention without blame loops.
Zoom out every few months to celebrate wins, prune what’s not working, and realign agreements.
A simple ritual to reflect, appreciate, and update; keeps growth intentional and resentment low.
Six simple steps you can run in short sessions — each mapped to a tool.
Map relationships and values so assumptions are visible. This lowers anxiety and makes later decisions easier.
Align on time, info, health, and family. Color‑code boundaries (red/amber/green) so safety and freedom can coexist.
Stay aligned with a short agenda and built‑in reassurance prompts. Prevent spirals and reduce drift.
Spot the trigger, regulate your body, and ask for what would help — with words that land.
Agree before, debrief kindly after, and keep STI practices visible. More trust, more freedom.
Move from impact to concrete repair and prevention with a simple six‑step script.
“We couldn’t make it work before. The jealousy tools and weekly check‑ins gave us shared language and simple rituals. We’re calmer, clearer, and genuinely happier.”
“The Agreement Canvas finally got us aligned. We stopped arguing about ‘rules’ and started agreeing on needs. Way less friction.”
“Short, practical, and kind. The repair steps saved us after a breach. We had a plan, not panic.”
Purpose · Time & Logistics · Info Sharing · Health & Safety · Family & Social · Emotional Support.
Grounding · Wins · Feelings & Needs · Logistics · Updates · Closing Ritual.
“I notice I feel jealous when… The story I tell myself is… What I need right now is…”
Jordan Avery (she/her) has practiced ethical non‑monogamy for years — including marriage and parenting. She writes the kind of resource she wished existed early on: clear, kind, and practical.
This playbook doesn’t replace therapy; it gives you a shared structure and words for the moments that matter, so you can stay connected while you grow.
$19
$39
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The Playbook is for couples and individuals who are in — or curious about — ethical non‑monogamy. If you want practical tools you can use tonight (not just theory), you’ll feel at home here. It also helps a visiting partner (“the third”) understand how to fit in respectfully.
Most tools take 15–30 minutes. We suggest “micro‑doses”: pick one worksheet this week, try it once, and then adjust together. You don’t need to “finish the whole book” to feel benefits — one small ritual (like a weekly check‑in) can noticeably lower anxiety and increase connection.
No. It’s a practical toolkit — agendas, worksheets, and scripts — to make hard conversations easier and more kind. Many readers also use therapy; the Playbook gives you shared language and structure between sessions. It does not replace professional care when that’s needed.
We offer three options depending on how deep you want to go. Start free with a taste, then grab the full playbook — and add the toolbox when you're ready to work through the exercises together.
Yes. You can start solo. Try one 15‑minute worksheet (for example, mapping feelings and needs) and then share a few highlights. The scripts help you make gentle invitations and get to “yes” without pressure. Many couples begin with one person leading; the structure keeps it light and safe.
Yes. It’s written to be consent‑first, LGBTQIA+ inclusive, and trauma‑aware. Examples cover different relationship shapes, and metamour guidance focuses on respect, not rules. Use the language that fits you — the tools are adaptable.
Keep it simple. Read the short intro, then do one tool together:
That’s enough to create momentum and reduce uncertainty right away.
30‑day money‑back guarantee. If it doesn’t help, reply to your receipt or contact support — no hoops to jump through. We’d love to know what didn’t work so we can keep improving, but refunds are hassle‑free.
Delivery is handled securely via Gumroad. We never sell or share your data. You receive a proper receipt, and you can access your files any time from your Gumroad Library.
Yes. If we update the PDF or templates, you can re‑download the latest version from your Gumroad Library using the same purchase email.
You get a high‑quality PDF that reads well on phone, tablet, and desktop. Key worksheets are designed to be printable. Templates are provided as Google Docs (included with Playbook + Toolbox) so you can make a copy to your Drive; you can also export to Microsoft Word (.docx) from Google Docs if you prefer.
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